IT'S MUELLER TIME.
MINUS HAPPY HOUR
“What Thou asketh, Thou Pompous One,” Cat hissed back. “Please ask and/or answer in plain English.”
“The Mueller Report – what do you think?”
“What do you think I think?” Cat said. “I think what you think, what everyone who despises the Trump presidency thinks: It’s disappointing as heck.”
I appreciated Cat’s discipline in not resorting to foul language.
“BIG WIN FOR TRUMP,” he said. “For two years, Trump has been trumpeting “No collusion.” He said over and over and over and over and over and over.“
“What are you having for breakfast today, Mr. President?”
“Where did you go to college?”
“What color is the sky?”
“How about those emoluments?”
Here’s the headline on The Washington Post webpage shortly after Atty. Gen William Barr released his summary of the Mueller report:
Mueller Time is over.
Now it’s Trump’s Time.
A time when lots of Democrats, lots of Independent voters, lots of people of good will, lots of absolutely decent, patriotic women and men will be bending themselves into pretzels, trying to explain the nuances of the Barr summary in positive terms, And turn that into some sort of bumper sticker:
No Collusion? Yes.
No Conclusion? Maybe.”
That last part has to do with Barr saying that Mueller did not come to a conclusion as to whether Trump tried to scuttle the investigation. But if you have to fit all that onto a bumper sticker, there’s zero chance of the guy in the car in back of you reading the whole thing.
One thing Cat and I didn’t do was turn on the TV or the radio (most of the public radio stations are doing fundraising, so they wouldn’t have been turned on anyway, because no one in their right mind can stand to hear those fund raising pitches over and over. no matter how necessary), and therefore we didn’t have to hear pointless discussion about whether this help Trump’s reelection campaign (of course, it will help). And how much will it help (who knows?)
“Here’s the bright side,” I said to Cat.
“The bright spot?” he replied, astonished.
“Now impeachment is off the table,” I said. “Out of the question.”
“No way,” Cat said “He still sucks up to Putin. Every single day, he fails to support and defend the Constitution of the United States against all enemies, foreign and domestic – quite the opposite. He’s not defending the planet against climate change. He’s creating division and hatred, starting with immigrants. He lies, insults, belittles, hurts, steals. There are hundreds of high crimes and misdemeanors - all impeachable.”
“You’ve nailed it, Cat,” I said. “Michael Cohen couldn’t have said it better. But Mueller’s investigation ‘clears’ him in the eyes of his cult, had the members been having secret doubts in the first place. And many other people just don’t want to be bothered, these being the most dangerous people in a democracy.”
“But what about justice?” Cat asked. “What about just plain old fashioned fairness?”
“There’s an election coming up,” I said. “That’s what elections are for.”
“But elections put a sadist n the White House,” Cat said. “They’ve put horrible, terrifying people in office all over the world. Voters in England voted to wreck their economy. In the Philippines, they voted for a murderer who talks up rape. Voters get it wrong, and lately it seems they get it wrong all the time.”
“But sometimes,” I said, “they get it right.”
“Here’s my thinking,” Cat said, “Right now, here in this Mueller Moment, it doesn’t feel like it’s going to work out.”
“It’s been a very bad day,” I agreed.
“More bad days after that?”
“Many more,” I said. “Sooner or later, though, there will be some of the other kind of days, too.”
“But today was one of the worse,” Cat said, “ranking right up there with election night, 2016.”
“Trump being the kind of guy he is,” I said, "it means that tomorrow could be even worse.”
Trump being the kind of guy he is means that some tomorrow down the line, somewhere, sometime, there will be a better day.
It's just that today isn't one of them.