TRACKING TRUMP
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DAY 1165

3/30/2020

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A LUCKY DOG TAKES A WALK
in a time of pandemic, Celebrating the Ordinary

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    WE SPEND a lot of time in this space worrying about the ways in which a cruel man is tearing apart our country because he managed to win an election and might do it again.
    But it shouldn’t take a microbe to tell us there is a lot more to our lives than Donald Trump.
    It shouldn’t be that way. But it is, and as the coronavirus pandemic closes in on our little corner of the Atlantic seacoast in Newport, R.I., I’ve been thinking about many things, but mainly that I’m a lucky dog.
    “Phoebe,” you say, “we think of you as a ‘sweet’ dog. What’s luck got to do with it?”
    Okay, try this.
    I live a couple of blocks away from one of the most famous mansions in the world. “The Breakers” was built by the Vanderbilt robber baron dynasty and has 70 rooms. Up to 1 million tourists pay to walk through it and nearby mansions every year.
    “But, you’re a dog, and they don’t let dogs in, so that’s lucky?”
    During the COVID-19 pandemic, nobody else is getting into The Breakers, either. Governor Gina Raimondo of Rhode Island, unlike Trump, is working hard to keep her voters alive. She's issuing tough love orders about “social distancing,” telling bars to close and restaurants to do only do take-out; advising New Yorkers fleeing to their summer homes to age-in-place for a couple of weeks after they get here, and telling people who favor crowds to "cut it out!"
    All I'm saying is that I live in a house the size of a grape, but within walking distance of The Breakers.
    On some days, like today, The Grouchy One and I walk to The Breakers and keep going to the Cliff Walk, which is behind the mansion and is another big tourist draw. It’s pretty spectacular, with jagged cliffs and the ocean on one side and a bunch of mansions on the other side, although none as humongous as The Breakers.
    All we have  to do is walk out the front door of the grape, turn left, keep going straight.
     “So, you live in a snooty place. You’re trying to rub it in?
    Not my point. It’s a fact that in a small state like Rhode Island, most people live minutes from the seacoast, a park, a forest, a river, Narragansett Bay or something similar. And then there’s the country itself, the United States of America, which turns out be a pretty good place to be. Lucky us.
     “Blah, blah, Phoebe. What’s the big deal?”

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THESE ARE DAYS when you or somebody you care about wakes up in the morning and realizes that's a good thing. Tomorrow is another matter, but it's not something you take for granted.
    You can hear it in the phone calls. The Humans have been on the phone a lot while waiting for the full force of COVID-19 to strike, sometimes using what they call the “speaker,” so they each can hear both sides of the conversations, and so can I.
    They talk to their “children,” who are actually grownups, and have been for a while, and with other members of the family, in Vermont and as far away as London. And they are talking with friends they used to work with or who were classmates in college. A lot of them are in their  70s and some in their 80s. They've all had other health issues, which is a qualification for membership in the coronavirus “vulnerable” club – Trump’s people use the  term "expendable.".
    Listening in, as dogs do, these conversations sound pretty ordinary, boring, in fact.
    Hello, what are you doing, how are you, am I calling at a good time, how’s the weather, the kids, the grandkids, what’s the weather like, been to the store lately, it’s raining here, again, what are you watching on Netflix, reading any good books, more rain tomorrow and can you believe what Trump said. The usual stuff.
     “You sure know how to do boring, Phoebe. Be a good girl and wrap things up.”
    Boring?
    That's what I thought, until I realized what’s different about these phone calls is that they aren't as much about hello as  goodbye.

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 IT'S MORNING. I wake up early. Then I get Grouchy up; drag him out the front door; we turn left, walk straight ahead and keep going.
    At The Breakers, the tall iron gates are  closed, a chain wrapped around the iron bars, secured by a padlock. We go to the Cliff Walk. Ocean waves are rolling in, still scary beautiful, even on a foggy day, but no one is around to see that, except us.
    On the way back, we go through my favorite park, which is popular  with lots of other dogs and their people. No one around today.  The playground swings and merry-go-round are wrapped in yellow caution tape, in case a visitor misses the PLAYGROUND CLOSED UNTIL FURTHER NOTICE sign.
    My world is the same, but it's also different.
   Back home, The Nice One is having breakfast, and Grouchy begins fixing mine, which means pouring pellets from a container into into a bowl.
   Another day, a routine day, a good day, is getting underway but not taken for granted. Tomorrow is a question. Today, I'm a lucky dog.
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dAY 1160

3/26/2020

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A THERAPY DOG’S COVID-19 DILEMMA:
WHETHER TO TELL HIGH-RISK FRIENDS THE BAD NEWS - TRUMP’S RATINGS ARE RISING

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MY MAJOR JOB at our house is to keep a pair of Humans smiling and in good spirits.
   I have this trick, for example, of grabbing a tennis ball, then tossing it up in the air and chasing it around the living room. Grab. Toss. Chase. Gets a big laugh every time.
   But getting a chuckle out of my “client base” – I am a trained therapy dog – is increasingly difficult these days.
   Even in normal times, it’s harder to cheer up The Grouchy One than The Nice One, although she’s no Pollyanna when it comes to what’s wrong with the world, politics and that sort of thing.
   But with the coronavirus pandemic, my job is much harder.
   The bad numbers keep rolling in, as I’m sure you’re aware. And they are really alarming.
   No, not those numbers, the ones tracking the exponentially rising deaths and infections in New York City, which is just a few hours’ drive from our corner of paradise in Newport, R.I.
   The statistics I’m worried about are survey results the Gallup poll has been dribbling out all week.  In fact, I suspect Gallup is releasing them bit by bit because they are so distressing, so inexplicable, so hard on the stomach.
   Here’s a summary of Gallup’s serial (killer) reports:
  • Trump’s approval rating: Highest of his presidency at 49 percent.
  • His handling of the coronavirus crisis: 60 percent approval.
  • The country’s assessment of how news media is performing during the crisis: 55 percent disapprove; 44 percent approve; 1 percent, no opinion.
   How do you keep everyone laughing with numbers like that?
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MY FIRST LINE of defense may be to keep the poll results hidden for as long as possible.
   I know, you’re saying that as a blogger, whose writing is available to an international audience thanks to the Internet, that my primary responsibility is to get the news out quickly and accurately.
   But these people are my friends, as well as my clients.
   For heaven’s sake, don’t these poor Humans have enough on their minds without having to worry about whether the country is going stark raving mad?
   Here’s another number I have to consider: The Nice One and The Grouchy One are 77.
   It’s been years since they became eligible to join the AARP, granted that organization sets a low bar for membership, 50 years and up. But 77 (seventy-seven) is a big number. My Humans are no longer just senior citizens;  they’re senior, senior, senior citizens.
   That puts them at “high risk”  of being victims most endangered by the novel coronavirus. By the way, what’s with this “novel” bit? Why do they call it that? I thought novels are things you make into movies.
   My Humans have enough to consider without being burdened by the Gallup poll.
   It’s not out of the question that one of these days we’ll be rushing to our local ICU, where our troubles will just be starting, thanks to Donald J-for-Jerk Trump, whose ineptness means there’s not enough medical equipment to keep old folks chugging.
   I have these daydreams about my changing role in all of this. No longer a “sweet” dog, but now a wolf descendant, with a full set of teeth and claws on all four feet, I use my super sense of smell to find the supply room where the last ventilator is stored. Because I’m ready to do whatever it takes for these guys, and don't you think that I'm only the court jester around here.

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IT COULD BE that I’m getting ahead of myself. Nice and Grouchy are healthy old things.
   But still, that Gallup information is going be hard for them to swallow.
   Trump being rated 49 percent approval as president, and 60 percent on handling the virus business is beyond comprehension.
   You would think that his behavior at his daily TV briefing/campaign-rallies are Exhibit A for launching emergency impeachment proceedings. Rambling, incoherent, bumbling, he lies every day, berates, brags and violates the very social-distancing standards he’s supposed to be promoting by standing shoulder-to-shoulder with Doc Fauci, the vice president, surgeon general and his cast of sycophants.
   As usual, you can argue that his behavior is brilliant Trump-craft, that there’s a method and plan. Maybe he is hoping that Pence, whom he appointed to “lead” the administration’s virus program, will become infected, since the Veep has a better COVID-19 performance rating: 61 percent compared to Trump’s 60. And of course, Trump can’t abide Fauci, who can speak in complete sentences.
   But the fact that Trump is pushing to end the containment regimen and put America “back to work” is no laughing matter, unleashing a once unthinkable national debate about whether old people – nice and grouchy ones alike – are expendable in a trade-off between resuscitating the stock market or your grandma.
   It’s discouraging that 60 percent of Americans might agree with Trump, while 55 percent are critical of a news media that's telling them just how dangerous Trump has become.
   Granted, the Gallup numbers are confusing.
   For example, if a majority of survey respondents disapprove of the media’s performance, Gallup also reports that people are paying attention to news about coronavirus: 66 percent are following news “very closely,” and another 27 “somewhat closely.”
   Also, 51 percent expect the crisis to last months, while only 36 percent say it will take weeks to get back to normal, contrary to Trump’s Easter bunny fantasies of bringing an early halt to social distancing.

IN ANY CASE, you can see my dilemma.
   The coronavirus is something Nice and Grouchy can handle – they’re keeping a respectful distance from fellow Humans, washing their hands, wiping down door knobs. I’m betting they’ll survive the COVID-19 crisis.
   But if they learn that Trump may be on his way to a Second Term, I’m not so sure how that will hit their will to live.
   So, I’ll probably skip the Gallup reports for now and dig up some Peter, Paul and Mary, Kingston Trio and Joni Mitchel records to spin on their high fidelity turntable, and maybe I’ll do that tennis ball routine in the living room.
   Grab. Toss. Chase. That’ll get them smiling again.

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DAY 1151

3/16/2020

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CONFUSED BY THE CORONAVIRUS CRISIS? A THERAPY DOG ANSWERS YOUR QUESTIONS

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EDITOR’S NOTE: Due to the COVID-19 coronavirus pandemic, and the high levels of anxiety and stress created by the still-evolving outbreak, we have asked, Phoebe, BA, BS, PhD, MA, RI, CT, VT, MADOG to answer your questions about the medical and economic aspects of the crisis.  
   “Doc” Phoebe also writes a blog followed by an international readership so infinitesimal that it cannot be found by Google or any other search engine. Widely regarded as a quack and a fraud, she has been banned by every state regulatory body from giving advice for a fee or for free in any discipline, including but not limited to: volcanology, particle physics, impractical physics, marine science, etymology, criminology, idolatry and vacuum cleaner repair.


   QUESTION: I recently purchased a Mercedes S-Class 450. I took out a second mortgage to pay the $94,250 starting price, and still I can't afford to feed or otherwise care for my 11 children, all of whom are under the age of 3. Because of “social distancing,” I’ve also lost my job. I’m worried sick.
   DR. PHOEBE: I'm sorry to hear that. What are you worried about?
   QUESTION: Can the Mercedes become infected with COVID-19?
   ANSWER: As with many aspects of the novel coronavirus, there are factors we’re still learning about. Generally speaking, if your car is still under warranty, you’re safe. But if the warranty has expired, you’re out of luck. As usual.

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"DOC" PHOEBE in her office in Newport's mansion district. Notice the distance between the noted therapist and the chair reserved for her clients,the first of which she has yet to schedule.
   QUESTION: Are Republicans and Democrats equally susceptible to the coronavirus?
   ANSWER: Yes. And no. Yes, Republicans are more likely to become ill if they are members of the "Dine With Devin Club."  Recently, Rep. Devin Nunes, Republican of California, distanced himself from “social distancing” prescribed by health officials to slow the pace of the infection by staying away from large groups in places like restaurants and bars. Nunes was having none of it. "If you're healthy, you and your family, it's a great time to go out and go to a local restaurant,” Nunes said on national TV. “Let's not hurt the working people in this country ... go to your local pub.”
   No, if you’re a "Breakfast With Bernie" Democrat. Vermont Sen. Bernie Sanders is a champion social distancer. So, while Sanders may not survive his primary fight with former Vice President Joe Biden to win the Democratic nomination, he's likely to live another day to eat by himself in the Senate cafeteria. Turns out he’s just as grumpy in person as he is on the campaign trail, so much so that his fellow Senators reportedly won’t dine with him. Good for them. Good for Bernie.

   QUESTION: I’m worried about running out of toilet paper. And the stores shelves are empty because of panic buying and hoarding. What should I do?
   ANSWER: Personally, I've never seen the need.

   QUESTION: But as a therapist, you certainly don’t condone panic-buying and hoarding?
   ANSWER: Of course not. While it is understandable that we fear going hungry, we must learn to think of ourselves as members of a community, not just individuals, recognizing that each person’s actions affects the greater village. For example, you’re cruising the supermarket, and in the freezer section you see that there are only 10 tubs remaining of Breyer’s Natural Vanilla,  “made with fresh cream, milk and sugar.” As a responsible and ethical citizen, who knows that many others also crave Breyer's Natural Vanilla, and summoning all of your willpower, you limit yourself to taking just 9 of the 10 tubs.

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A MODEL of patience and calm, Doc Phoebe waits for her first client at her office, located outdoors, another example of her commitment to social distancing.
   QUESTION: Is President Trump responsible for the United States’ slow response to the crisis, because he disbanded a national pandemic preparedness unit; violated “social distancing” advice by shaking hands with and standing close to CDC and business officials at a televised news conference; and by lying about, belittling and minimizing the danger of the virus threat?
    ANSWER: Yes.
   QUESTION: Does that mean that the Republicans and other people – who up to now have blindly believed everything he says and helped him carry out his cruel agenda that mistreats asylum-seekers and furthers climate change – will change their minds about him?
   ANSWER: No.
   QUESTION: Why?
   ANSWER: It’s a mystery to me.
   QUESTION: But Doc, you’re a world famous pundit and therapist. Why don’t you have the answers to the questions that I and millions of other Americans are asking?
   ANSWER: Because these are weird and strange times. For which I say, thank goodness.
   QUESTION:  What’s good about it?
   ANSWER: It’s good if you’re a therapist.

   QUESTION: Doc, I fell asleep during what could be the final debate in the Democratic primary, as Bernie Sanders and Joe Biden "discussed" whether then-General Washington offered Medicare for all as a show of good faith to the troops he implored to stay the course at Valley Forge. Am I a bad civic citizen for nodding off?
   ANSWER: You are a patriot. And a well-adjusted one. You served your country well, because medical experts tell us that one of the best ways to weather the COVID-19 storm is to remain healthy as possible, including getting a good night's sleep. Plus, anyone who sat through the whole thing was either paid to do so or crazy. A grateful nation thanks you!

   QUESTION: Dr.Phoebe, do you have any other advice for me and other American's trying to cope with the coronavirus pandemic?
   ANSWER: As a matter of fact: If you or a friend happen to be in a supermarket, and you spot a fresh supply of "Natural Balance Limited Ingredient Diet Chicken & Sweet Potato Formula," in cans with a green label and small silhouette  of a dog, phone my office immediately. We have a crew on standby 24-7, plus a truck capable of transporting up to 50 cases of 12 cans each. We can be there in a matter of minutes.

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    A "sweet dog" confronts the catastrophe of the Trump presidency

    The Tracker

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    PHOEBE might have remained a “sweet” and apolitical dog but for the Trump crisis. Now, like millions of Americans, she wrestles daily with the challenge of what to do about it. With no illusions about the impact, she founded and is the principal writer of the Tracking Trump  blog.

    In Memoriam

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    CAT, a cat and Libertarian was Phoebe's co-author. He died Nov. 14, 2019. His self-described role was to leaven Phoebe’s naiveté and idealism with “common sense." He is remembered and missed.

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