WITH THE ELECTION AROUND THE CORNER, WHICH VOTERS ARE MORE TERRIFIED: TRUMP’S OR BIDEN’S?
The election - you heard it here first - is 139 days from now.
Only 139 days to go until …! Which isn’t even FIVE months until the world …!
Don’t get me wrong about Trump voters. They do want him to win, and according to some polls, they are more “enthusiastic” about Trump than Biden’s supporters are about him. Which is to say, Trump’s people remain as always: obsessive zealots, cultists manically devoted to the Worst President Ever.
But they are enthusiastic only in the way sports fans are enthusiastic their teams; they sound wild, crazy, and committed right up to the final game; but they also realize that losing is just part of the game, not end of the world. Go Sox. Go Trump.
I'LL PAUSE HERE to explain a dog's view of Human history.
Long, long ago, before the Covid-19 pandemic’s arrival in January or February, the Ancients were devoted to rituals known as “sports.” These were games that involved throwing, hitting, catching and bouncing balls of various sizes and shapes, but at skill levels far beyond my own, and I am part Labrador retriever.
These games took place in massive stadiums, seating thousands of “fans,” while millions more followed “the action” on TV or on their “personal devices.”
Between games, fans endlessly debated the merits, shoe endorsements, talents, weaknesses, medical histories, political beliefs, musical tastes, lifetime records and genomes of players, coaches, assistant coaches, assistant managers, as well as team owners, who sportscasters reverently referred to as “Mister.” Each sport concluded its “season” in playoffs with superlative titles, such as “Super,” “World” and "FedEx.” They followed the same pattern, with one team winning and other losing, a recurring anticlimax that left the universe unchanged.
The fans returned to their regular lives, sustained by vivid, if unrealistic, dreams of “next year.”
Should they lose in November, the T's will shrug it off with a “It was fun while it lasted.” Some may acknowledge that “I never liked the Tweets,” and “I wouldn’t want my daughters to ride in an elevator with Trump.” And should Trump be ousted in a voter landslide, the T’s will remember it this way: “I don’t remember who I voted for.”
They will not be okay with losing. They will not return to normal. Their passion is born of terror and the certainty that if Biden loses, there is no next time, no tomorrow, no next year, no afterlife.
Unlike the Trump voters, the Biden voters – including the Humans I live with – are less invested in a particular candidate than they in getting rid of Trump. In fact, if Biden suddenly dropped out of the race, his voters will enthusiastically support any substitute, for example, one of Biden’s primary rivals, or even a carrot, preferably one that's organic and non-GMO.
Biden voters cannot fathom a Trump second term.
At 1,242 days since Trump’s inauguration, they have a clear vision about what a second Donald J. Trump term means.
- Four more years of Trump means THE DEATH OF DEMOCRACY.
- Trump’s reelection means THE COLLAPSE OF CIVILIZATION.
- A Trump victory means AN ENVIRONMENTAL CATASTROPHE THAT WILL MAKE LIFE ON EARTH UNSUSTAINABLE.
But not for Trump’s voters.
The T’s will miss their entertainer-in-chief's gift for shock, insult and sacrilege, but they'll note that the Trump 24-hour Twitter cycle was losing its sparkle after nearly four years, and there's better (as in meaner, more diabolical) stuff on regular TV.
The B’s envision an authoritarian regime that just got started during the first term, with Trump demonizing immigrants and taking baby steps to discredit the press. In his second term, he'll abolish a seditious media, expand the roster of despised groups and establish – in law and in culture – a new and enduring apartheid. As for social programs like healthcare, Food Stamps, affordable housing and Social Security, you might be able to read about them in microfilmed back issues of newspapers, if you can find a library that’s still open.
The T’s objections to “the government” were never about reform, just opportunities to complain and criticize. As for keeping score of Trump’s broken promises about draining the swamp and creating the best health plan ever, that turned out to be too wonky and pointless. No problem, then, in going back to watching Fox' gladiators eviscerate, humiliate and exaggerate the actual and fictional shortcomings of an incoming Biden or a Non-GMO Organic Carrot Administration.
The B’s know that the Trumpeteers barely got started during the first term in the crusade to accelerate climate change. The B's are certain that in the second term, Trump will put that cause on warp speed, with the EPA renamed the EDA ( “Protection” becomes “Destruction”). Wildfires, sea-level rise, hurricanes, heat waves, blizzards, floods, drought and tornadoes will set new and horrifying records, except there won’t be any scientists to measure, validate and record them.
AS THE ELECTION CLOSES IN, here’s one dog’s reading – as a long-time observer of Human behavior – of the difference between the B’s and the T’s:
The B’s care. And the T’s could care less.
The T’s will cheer if Trump survives. If not, they’ll get over it, even as they share in the benefits of a restored democracy, a more just society, better health care and a rescued environment.
The B’s, however, have everything to lose.
As does the rest of the world.